my life through my tinted glasses
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
  :: Lonely ::

I can feel loneliness le.. it is such an empty feeling.. like you can meet all the objectives you have in your life.. but you just dont feel complete.. emptiness in you.. seems so deep... like falling into a pitless hole..

okies.. long time since i blogged... but din expect the blog to be negative...

i had always wanted to tell myself.. all is fine.. i am coping well.. i am strong.. i can weather thru this 2 years... but.. am i deluding myself?

colleague reminded me that gers have to be pampered.. gers need to be assured.. gers needs affirmation.. gers need affection..

well.. dint have all that for the past 2 months.. am i normal? or am i not a ger? keep watching shows.. so envious when they filmed a couple together... at MRT trains.. when couples together.. ger slping on guy's shoulder.. things that i once did.. but cant do again at least for the next 2 years.. just cant face that fact... things that i once have.. that i once took for granted... no longer have.. no longer exist.. at least for the next 2 years...

i know i will sound silly after 2 years.. reading my blogs again.. thinking y am i so silly to think of these... but just could help it.. no matter how rational i can be now.. its just my emotions raging.. emotions overtaking my mental capability...

i know i just need a quiet corner somewhere..

think its the coffee.. it always causes me to be too alert and start thinking of unnecessary things.. but not strong enough to put me thru rational thinking...

haiz.. i should just shower and go to slp.. probably that may help...  12:00 AM
a life of a NTU girl.. bored with life

Archives
04/25/2004 - 05/02/2004 / 05/02/2004 - 05/09/2004 / 05/09/2004 - 05/16/2004 / 05/16/2004 - 05/23/2004 / 05/23/2004 - 05/30/2004 / 05/30/2004 - 06/06/2004 / 06/06/2004 - 06/13/2004 / 06/13/2004 - 06/20/2004 / 06/20/2004 - 06/27/2004 / 06/27/2004 - 07/04/2004 / 07/04/2004 - 07/11/2004 / 07/11/2004 - 07/18/2004 / 07/18/2004 - 07/25/2004 / 07/25/2004 - 08/01/2004 / 08/01/2004 - 08/08/2004 / 08/08/2004 - 08/15/2004 / 08/15/2004 - 08/22/2004 / 08/22/2004 - 08/29/2004 / 08/29/2004 - 09/05/2004 / 09/05/2004 - 09/12/2004 / 09/12/2004 - 09/19/2004 / 09/19/2004 - 09/26/2004 / 09/26/2004 - 10/03/2004 / 10/03/2004 - 10/10/2004 / 10/10/2004 - 10/17/2004 / 10/17/2004 - 10/24/2004 / 10/24/2004 - 10/31/2004 / 10/31/2004 - 11/07/2004 / 11/07/2004 - 11/14/2004 / 11/14/2004 - 11/21/2004 / 11/21/2004 - 11/28/2004 / 11/28/2004 - 12/05/2004 / 12/12/2004 - 12/19/2004 / 12/19/2004 - 12/26/2004 / 12/26/2004 - 01/02/2005 / 01/09/2005 - 01/16/2005 / 01/16/2005 - 01/23/2005 / 01/23/2005 - 01/30/2005 / 01/30/2005 - 02/06/2005 / 02/06/2005 - 02/13/2005 / 02/20/2005 - 02/27/2005 / 02/27/2005 - 03/06/2005 / 03/06/2005 - 03/13/2005 / 03/13/2005 - 03/20/2005 / 03/20/2005 - 03/27/2005 / 03/27/2005 - 04/03/2005 / 04/03/2005 - 04/10/2005 / 04/10/2005 - 04/17/2005 / 04/17/2005 - 04/24/2005 / 04/24/2005 - 05/01/2005 / 05/01/2005 - 05/08/2005 / 05/08/2005 - 05/15/2005 / 05/15/2005 - 05/22/2005 / 05/22/2005 - 05/29/2005 / 05/29/2005 - 06/05/2005 / 06/05/2005 - 06/12/2005 / 06/19/2005 - 06/26/2005 / 07/03/2005 - 07/10/2005 / 07/10/2005 - 07/17/2005 / 07/17/2005 - 07/24/2005 / 07/24/2005 - 07/31/2005 / 08/07/2005 - 08/14/2005 / 08/21/2005 - 08/28/2005 / 08/28/2005 - 09/04/2005 / 09/18/2005 - 09/25/2005 / 10/02/2005 - 10/09/2005 / 11/20/2005 - 11/27/2005 / 01/08/2006 - 01/15/2006 / 01/15/2006 - 01/22/2006 / 01/22/2006 - 01/29/2006 / 01/29/2006 - 02/05/2006 / 02/12/2006 - 02/19/2006 / 02/26/2006 - 03/05/2006 / 03/19/2006 - 03/26/2006 / 04/02/2006 - 04/09/2006 / 04/23/2006 - 04/30/2006 / 05/14/2006 - 05/21/2006 / 05/28/2006 - 06/04/2006 / 06/25/2006 - 07/02/2006 / 07/02/2006 - 07/09/2006 / 07/09/2006 - 07/16/2006 / 07/16/2006 - 07/23/2006 /


Powered by Blogger

Subscribe to
Posts [Atom]