my life through my tinted glasses
Monday, July 05, 2004
  Photos

Not sure if its works the same way here.. lets give it a try....



  10:30 PM
  I am so stressed...

I am feeling stressed. becos of the PA report.. becos of HWN.. and most of all.. becos of my chalet. i feel like abandoning the chalet.. as if it is not organised at all in the first place..

pple cant confirm.. dunno who is coming.. dunno wad is needed.. dunno how the bbq on the 9th and 10th will be.. everything i dunno... sigh.. really feel like washing them off my hands.. and let them be.. regretted taking the initiative.. shld not have offered the chalet.. becos .. there are pple out there who does not appreciate things at all.. pple out there who takes things for granted.. of course there are lots of other pple who helps to contribute to the chalet.. there are pple who ask if there is anything that they can help.. i really appreciate them.. however.. sometimes i feel like as if they are asking for the sake of asking.. i jus need the attendance to be confirmed.. and if they can contribute some equipment for the chalet.. wah pengz.. till now cannot confirm.. they think my sms free ah.. every time sms them.. cant they just take the initative to msg some of the friends they know?? my name list is on the net already.. as long as their name not on list means not confirm ma... i m very pek chek.. and i dun think i will enjoy my party at all... (disclaimer: Them.. refered to HRC as general.. not individuals..)

AAHHH... i m so stressed.. i dunno y.. probably becos of pms ba.. ahhh... no one can help me.. even my closest clique cannot even stay for my birthday.. well.. i know they have their reasons.. i do understand.. but... but.. they are my closest clique.. sometimes i feel so.... lonely... (disclaimer again, not all my closest clique cannot make it...) come to think of it.. even my closest clique cant confirm attendance..

i m so sick of these whole thing.. although most things are settled.. like my birthday one.. my uncle settling for me.. then my mom side.. my mom settle.. now my dad side.. dun think he will settle for me.. he push everything to me.. sigh.. even dear cannot help me.. i feel so tight.. prob is just.. my mental state.. i feel that there is no close one to help me to tend to things.. (although really appreciate friends who are willing to help me.. ) the saddest part is that my dear cant even attend my cake cutting session... understand he has his work to do.. cannot come on time.. but will rush down asap.. but... sigh.. i feel that i m all alone....

wanna cry sia.. feel so depressed.. and to think that i m depressed over my birthday party and not some huge events.. =~~(
  1:42 AM
a life of a NTU girl.. bored with life

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